Like I said, it’s not PC to do anything but admire the Paralympics. But come on, some of the Paralympic events are pretty absurd.
Take goalball, for example.
The game is played on an indoor court with two teams of three players each. Each player is blindfolded and stands in front of their goal. The spectators must be completely silent. Then the team with possession takes a ball filled with bells and the designated shooter hurls it as hard as he can at the other side.
The other team listens and the players try to throw themselves on top of the ball or in the way of the ball to prevent it from entering their goal.
Remember, everybody is blindfolded and half of them are lying on the ground, waiting to get pummeled by a big hard ball with a lot of bells inside it.
Goalball. That’s gotta hurt.
Take wheelchair rugby, as a second example.
As far as I can tell, it’s pretty much like wheelchair basketball except you score by carrying the ball across the end-zone line, kind of like a touchdown.
But this is the most absurdly violent, yet deadly earnest, sporting event I have ever seen. (Perhaps with the exception of the Filene’s Basement annual bridal gown sale event. People get trampled to death in that shit...and that's real.)
The wheelchairs are souped up with reinforced frames and wheels. And it seems athletes are not only permitted, but encouraged, to ram into each other and throw themselves recklessly in each other’s way, often overturning their wheelchairs, after which the ref must stop play and helpers rush in to set the wheelchairs upright again.
Bumper Car Rugby. That’s gotta hurt.
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